My father hit me a lot on childhood. Once, when he was drunk, he knock my head against the wall. Most of times I hadn't done anything.
Today I already know that I have Asperger, but when I was young and didn't know this he beat me to learn to be social. Hit me for futile reasons.
I hope that you learn to deal with these issues better and proceed your life in a most comfortable way.
Life itself is one long, traumatic experience for me, in all honesty.
I'm extremely sensitive as well and no matter how much I try to not take things personally, I get hurt. Too hurt. Too many feelings. Even the slightest bit of negativity is enough to send me on a suicidal thought spiral at this point.
I won't go into all the stuff that's happened to me but I'll post some of the stuff I feel more comfortable talking about. I'm not asking for a pity party here or anything so please don't see it that way.
My grandmother has dementure and other mental illnesses and went crazy on me at one point, claiming I was harming her and my cat. She was eventually moved to a home, but I had to deal with her, alone while being extremely mentally broken myself. The fact I was not only mistreated by her(not her fault) and also mistreated her myself during all this hurts to this day, I wish I could have been a better person and not the way I am.
She was pretty much the only emotional support I had as well in my earlier years and to this day it still hurts that I have nobody I truly feel comfortable discussing my issues with and the one person I did, I ended up treating her like shit. (Even here, I don't feel comfortable going into a lot of stuff.) Never had any IRL friends or anything, and my mother is very emotionally distant due to having a shit life herself including many forms of abuse.
Overall my experience of life along with my mental illnesses have fucked me up to the point of no return. There isn't much hope for me apart from LFE, in all honesty.
The cruelty of this world will never cease to amaze me - how can people be that disgusting? Sigh.. I'm sorry you had to go through that shit.>>1710
I have Aspergers as well, and when I was young I was treated terribly in the "schooling"(prison) system for having Aspergers and other issues. I'm lucky enough to not have any intentional abuse from family at least. (I only have a mother and grandmother anyway.) I'm sorry that that happened, that's fucking awful and you shouldn't have had to experience that.>>1716
I've been stuck in my room myself for a very long time. I haven't been outside apart from by necessity for pretty much over a decade.
The fact that the only place we can feel safe is in our rooms is cruel, and for some they don't even have that luxury. :/
It's wrong how people are treated. I'm sorry that you had that shit happen to you, nobody deserves that.
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Today a shitstorm happened to me. My father again. Physically, I'm fine. But my mind is killing me.
Fuck dude you need to break this vicious cycle somehow, I guess getting police involved may be out of the question for you, but from seeing your other posts this went on for far too long man, you need to do a drastic change, hang in there man, I hope you find the strenght to put you in a better situation
i cant imagine what it must be like watching someone you love slowly die in the hospital, im sorry for your loss dude. lifes a fuckn bitch
in regards to me though i had to deal with my crackhead mom going on and off drugs for my entire life, even up until now. shed abandon me and steal my things while running the streets, or leave me alone in the house for long periods of time with nobody there to cook dinner or talk to me or actually raise me
also got cucked and molested multiple times by some crazy chick in elementary school. wew
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh now im just sad and edgy and suicidal
Raped when I was in elementary school, got beaten and emotionally abused by parents, was raised by alcoholics. Sometimes thought they were going to kill each other. Got taken away by CPS for a year, worst year of my life. Used to seek out adults and message them sexually when I was like 13. Had an irl friend who turned out to be a pedophile and his online pedo friend hit on me constantly when I was 16.
Once I had an NDE after trying to kill myself where I saw everything in the Universe as well as God. It was terrifying and comforting at once.
I have C-PTSD, OCD, and schizophrenia.
Not sure how to conclude this lol
geez where to start!
i was abused for a long time by my family and molested as a child so now im just real quiet.
i guess i formed some kinda maladaptive daydreaming habit and now im like… fine.
i don’t have a lot of friends but i make do!
i learned to treat everyone with love through it though! you never know if someone’s hurting and they deserve that love!
im also autistic and well… how people treat their autistic peers is trauma in and of itself.